Life can't always be fun - sometimes, you've just got to grind
#66 - dancing with my hips on a stage and with my fingers over keys
Hi there,
When 2 waves moving in opposite directions collide with each other, they sometimes reinforce and form a supercrest. That’s what this week has felt like: a superposition of commitments from a piano concert, to 3 speaking engagements and a nearly-2-hour-long Cambridge and maths lecture (tiring). The onslaught of tests has continued, with 2 on Monday and Tuesday and likewise in the week ahead - outrageous.
I must add that the haircut has had mixed, mostly neutral, reviews. I thought it would be incessantly mocked but no, much to my surprise and relief, people don’t mind it.
Highlight of the week ⭐: playing in the school Piano Concert. A wonderful convivial evening watching my friends showcase their incredible skills and I’ve never heard the piano live so well. 🎹
Now 66 issues in, I’d like to think this is a strong habit of mine now: writing these near-1000 word issues every Sunday evening describing my life, thoughts on my self-reflections, insights and learnings along with content you may wish to have a look at.
Yet the ideation and execution are nowhere near walks in the park1. It is still a struggle to churn an idea valuable enough to you, the reader, but also chunky enough to muster a whole post out of.
Last week was particularly challenging, perhaps the hardest I can ever remember it being in the last 16 months. I just couldn’t get to “pen to paper”, or fingers to keys, to even write something half decent.
Should I just close this and give up for tonight? No one’s going to notice. Oh, I can’t. I was late last week and promised I’d show up this week. 😖 Ok, let’s get something started and hope Isaac Newton’s laws will come to the rescue.
In the end, I put together a post - about being unafraid to ask for help and how people are indeed ‘happy to help’ - and sent it off. Job done, don’t have to worry about topics until this time next week.
30 minutes later, a message comes through from Karim, a new friend who’s been enjoying the recent posts. Quoting a section about non-hesitancy in asking, he said “I really love this…this is genuinely life changing advice”, which made me go 😍. Relief and ecstasy, borne from this external validation that, in fact, the post wasn’t just dithery sludge but actually useful stuff.
It reminded me of a quote from a lecture I watched last year by Steven Kotler where he spoke about the 6 types of grit. Number 4 was “the grit to be your best when you’re at your worst”. He links this to practising in circumstances more difficult than the real deal or making training harder than the game. Doing this means that if things do get that bad, you’re ready to deal with it but more importantly, it gives you confidence that you’ll be able to perform under normal conditions.
If you train to be your best when you are at your worst you can deal with all the challenges life throws at you. When you’re tired, instead of deferring to anxiety and stress, you are automatised to rise to the occasion.
This is what I tried to apply for last week’s issue, and it paid off. Here are 2 more examples of where this principle has worked for me:
Dancing at last year’s Diwali party 🕺 - my mum thinks I’ve got a special aptitude for dancing and being able to pull off great moves, leading to having many dance teachers and lessons since the age of 4. I’ve been off the boil in the past year, however, with both the need or want to jig never properly arising…until the annual conversation about dancing at the Diwali Party.
I was reluctant but went along with it, battling through the many arguments with my sister about which leg went first or me wanting to change a few steps. In the end, it was worth it - the brain was awash with plenty of endorphins and dopamine (I had a good time).
Doing Maths in Friday’s study 🎓 - I was getting stuck into some challenging Maths in my only study session of the week; alas, the room conditions weren’t very conducive to focused work. There was a flutter from my mind of “Screw this, I can’t do any work in this noise. We can do it at home.” In the end, I stayed the course and got through it, with quite a few right answers (well done me).
I once read about how when they lose concentration, “the most successful students…grit their teeth, flex their will-power muscle and get on with the work anyway. You're not always going to feel motivated to study, even when you have a clear, strong and compelling vision of your future.” When you feel like quitting, remind yourself of the reason you started, and why this task is important to you, and push through. I promise you’ll be proud of what you accomplish, however small.
P.S. enjoyed writing about this; I’ve found a few more articles worth reading and even a TED talk from Angela Duckworth, an expert on the subject - she’s written a whole book about grit! I’ll read through them all, sieve through the sand and present you with pure gold another time.
Book of the week 📖
Still hung up on the book about the stock market, One Up On Wall Street. Hoping to use the birth of a new month as fresh motivation.
Podcast of the week🎙️
The Daily Stoic: 5 Usable Practices From Stoicism
A recording of his talk to a group of US football athletes, it’s a fabulous summary of the key ideas in this field of happiness.
Article of the week 📰
I was asked to invent the next Wordle. How hard could it be?
Topping the charts for the most searched-for term on Google in 2022, Wordle captured the lives of millions of worldwide puzzlers. This ambitious reporter set out to create the next one - a fascinating tale.
Quote of the week 💬
Positivity is like a muscle: keep exercising it, and it becomes a habit. - Natalie Massenet
Ride the wave of February’s arrival to inspire you into action. If that motivation subsides, grit it out and you’ll reap the rewards
Adi
Or to use another idiom, like slicing a hot knife through butter.