Why it no longer impresses you much
Why it no longer impresses you much
#123 - summertime weather is pretty good
3 weeks after it was started, here is the next edition of The Sun’s Out. Apologies for the delay - I was out on my DofE practice expedition for 5 days.
Note: begins on Sunday 14th July.
Hi there,
I write as our neighbour blasts all-time football classics ahead of England’s big final in *checks time* 19 minutes. Unfortunately, that means you’re receiving your weekly dose of Adi a little later than usual.
It’s been a long week with over 100k steps, a lot of it thanks to 4 days at Symphony Hall, volunteering with Birmingham’s Music Service to run 4 mammoth concerts, including at least 2000 kids. It was a tiring effort but one I really enjoyed…and I got to watch 4 stellar concerts for free 😁
Highlight of the week: my breakfast this morning. I ate my usual Sunday morning treat of a cheese and egg sandwich1 along with starting a new TV series, ‘The Good Doctor’. After seeing bits on YouTube, the first episode was excellent. Finally, a series to watch! (I’ve been suffering from bounded rationality with TV choosing for a long time, so landing on one is a relief)
All these concerts reminded me of a conversation I had with a Y11 and Y12, Arjuna and Amelie, walking back up to school after some McDonalds (in the time between school ending and a school concert starting). We were discussing the Y11’s mock results and how he would like to improve a few of them.
“Honestly, once you get to Year 12, nobody will care about your GCSEs” was one of my points, which Amelie seconded (hedonic adaptation in action). I‘m sure a) people said that to me too, b) have said that to Arjuna too and that c) it comes off as “easy for you to say”.
As summer continues to chug along, with holidays in sight and then new beginnings soon after, I wanted to offer a reminder that “the marshmallow is at its sweetest before it is bitten”.
Turn back to the example with the GCSEs. Getting straight 9s was a sort of life mission for nearly 2 years. It should be extremely meaningful in a long-lasting way. Whilst I am proud of the achievement, it wasn’t life changing and it doesn’t feel as powerful as it did then.
The real inspiration for this post was a brilliant fish sandwich that I enjoyed at Symphony Hall. Having mentally licked my lips at the wonderful illustrations of the food on the screens in the adjacent café, as I shot up and downstairs, I saved it to eat on Wednesday or Thursday of the week. (huge buildup already…)
In the end, I chose a fish” Codfather Sarnie” sandwich, which you can see below. I will admit, it was pretty good, probably one of the best sandwiches I’ve ever had. However, all the inner hype about how juicy and soft the fish was going to be and how crunchy the chips would feel in my mouth probably made me feel the fanciness of it less. You could almost call it a reverse placebo effect.
2 more examples, since there’s not much in the way and strategies to discuss here, but more expectation management.
It is Olympics season, and one of my most memorable insights from the many podcasts I’ve listened to is that Bronze medalists are often happier than Silver medallists. Hmm, seems counterintuitive - here’s why.
The person in third place thinks “wow, I could have ended up with no medal. Instead, I am on the podium - go me! “On the other hand, the silver medalist: “Ah, I just miss out on a gold - darn it!” It all comes back to the perspective of how do you think about your achievement.
Finally, two months ago, India won a major international cricket event after 11 long years. Celebration on social media was immense. My decision to watch the full three hours of the final vindicated. Yet, I looked outside and the world hadn’t changed. I looked inside me, and didn’t feel overly buoyant at the team’s win. Before the taste of glory, we imagine how amazing it would feel. When you get it, it is no longer that sweet.
There is an element of “well, now what?”, especially for Gold medalists, since it’s the end of a journey, one of hard work, dedication and hot pursuit, and it can feel a bit empty.
I don’t know who needs to read this. Perhaps it’s my subconscious prepping me for the fast approaching Results Day. Remember, anticipation and looking forward to something can pop like a bubble (and sometimes we want that buildup of excitement) but you must remember that whatever you achieve, it will give you the highest pleasure just before you do.
Very roundabout way of saying, “manage your expectations”. Not being at my desk right now makes it difficult to add our usual resources. Nevertheless, here’s a quote.
In the end, you should always do the right thing, even if it is hard - Nicholas Sparks
I might be continuing our bi-weekly trend once more. Till next time, watch out for your mind tricking you with marshmallows.
And well done if you got the Shania Twain reference.
Adi
Bit like an Egg McMuffin