Looking forward can also be mindful
#52 - dishing out some awesome tunes
Hi there,
Good weekend? I hope so, especially if you had a long and tiresome week.
I spent my weekend in an art-y mood, going to my first ever live classical music concert in the nearby town hall before attending a Diwali party this afternoon ahead of the mega Hindu festival next Monday.
School-wise, we’ve started to fatigue and all look forward to the half term break beginning (early for us!) on Thursday afternoon. Not before two back-to-back Maths tests kick off the week though. 😐
Highlight of the week: performing at a party today. Playing 2 Tamil hits on the alto saxophone, combined with a dance with my sister, who also performed on the violin - it was a fantastic afternoon 🕺 💃. Nothing beats the pride that washes over you as you smile amid applause and cheers, and bow graciously. I will admit, however, that it required a lot of Mum pushing us to practice and rehearse, a difficult task for us both without arguing. It’s important to remember that “It will all be worth it in the end.”
“People only work from Monday to Friday, comfortable in the knowledge that they can drink, relax and let their hair down on Saturday. That’s what drives them.”
Words of wisdom from my dad’s friend that Dad occasionally recites. Let’s dive into how it appeared in my life.
As I said earlier, I went to an orchestral concert with a neighbour (and kind reader of the blog) Annie last night. The chilly wind outside was compensated for through warming rich music with stupendous1 solos and a well-rounded set of music, ably played. I thoroughly enjoyed it, admiring the sheer skill from my perspective as a musician and also how the experience of live music differs from recorded versions reverberating through my headphones.
Anyways, she mentioned another concert taking place in the mighty Symphony Hall in November. When I returned home, I warmed to the thought of spending a Sunday afternoon in the city, watching some incredible music. I phoned her up (albeit it was 10:30 pm 😬) and she was happy to take me along. Into the calendar it goes 🗓️2.
This action made me recall3 this advice from my dad's friend and the necessity to have things to look forward to. To make it through, let's be honest, your and my difficult lives, overflowing with endless pots of work and stress, we need a reward. The promise of a shiny golden star sticker, a reward to keep us sticking with it, can act as a good 'at least' motivator.
In this era of self-care, mindfulness and live-in-the-present-moment banners on t-shirts, self-improvement society frowns at postponing happiness to some later date. But maybe it is important to schedule some happiness, some self-love, some you-time for you, that you truly deserve.
After a good search, there seem to be 2 main benefits:
It acts as motivation. Like how my Mum strove to get that weighing scale needle jumping leftwards before the summer, it can become a goal to work towards. It can be a “pleasant distraction”, writes Kelsey Borresen, as you “start envisioning and fantasising about the positive experiences that await you”.
It gives you positive emotions like optimism, anticipation and gratitude. Often the anticipation is stronger than the actual joys of the event but if it all works out OK, who cares how excited you get? (More on this in this week’s podcast recommendation). When that thing eventually reaches the present, you feel it fully, being immersed in the bliss of the present moment, ironically, and sensing gratitude for such a wonderful experience.
And remember, it doesn’t have to be you dreaming about receiving that paycheck or test result at end of the month. It can be small things like your energising coffee boost in the morning or the next episode of that romantic comedy you’re in the middle of.
For me, this is in the form of having a ‘What are you looking forward to?” prompt in my morning journal (when I get myself to do it, once every two weeks). Having this mindset means you’ll end up noticing the good parts of life and start appreciating just how beautiful and gifted your life can be.
Life is hard, I get it. We both need something to look forward to cheer up, to make life that little bit more manageable, knowing that at the end of the road, there’s a delicious treat, waiting for us to savour it. What are you looking forward to?
Book of the week 📖
Shout it from the rooftop, bring out the confetti: Adi has finished a book. Yes, I have finally gotten to the bottom of How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. If you get past the title, it is a short and digestible book with actionable advice and as I’ve been half-baking them into my interactions with others, I’ve definitely noticed better connections and conversations. The Wealth of Nations will be a dense read, albeit abridged. I’ve also simultaneously started The Music of the Primes, a maths book about “the fundamental elements of maths”.
Podcast of the week🎙️
The Art of Manliness: #811: The Secrets to Booking Cheap Flights
The show’s name doesn’t correspond with what it’s all about. Scott Keyes highlights some pretty simple but clever things to think about when booking your holidays.
This is where he said something appropriate to this week’s Ray of Sunlight.
It turns out we actually get more happiness and more joy in the weeks and months leading up to a trip than we do on the trip itself, and we actually get more joy in the weeks and months after a trip, looking back on it, than we did on the trip itself. ... You can really enjoy your vacation by planning it further out and giving your today self the joy of that anticipation of looking forward to it.
I think that folks should be taking more effort to booking their travels further in advance and booking more of them, three months out, six months out. I’ve basically always got a trip booked three or six months out, so I have something to look forward to today that I can be excited about in the future.
Listen on for more, it’s a conversation you didn’t know you needed but you’ll enjoy.
Article of the week 📰
Sufficiently topical. Here’s a real-life experiment proving just how much we all sing to the tune of ‘Free Stuff’.
Quote of the week 💬
Knowing others is wisdom, knowing yourself is enlightenment.- Lao Tzu
I hope you have got something to look forward to in the upcoming week. If not, my blog will be here for you on Sunday night 😊.
Adi
Was thinking of a word to use and Chris Eubank’s excessive use of it on Celebrity MasterChef (which I’m currently watching) came to mind!
I’ve been getting my calendar sorted this week. As one of my favourite creators Ali Abdaal preaches “if it isn’t in your calendar, it doesn’t exist”.
P.S. I’ve been repeatedly told off in the past few weeks by my friend (and reader…of course wink) Viraj for taking too long ‘setting the scene’ and giving excessive unnecessary context before getting to the point. I couldn’t help it, I’m sorry.