You can't become top of the class
#37 - "I'm going through them like washing dishes!"
Hi there,
3/4s there - PAAAARTY š!!
Not quite, though. As my deputy headteacher phlegmatically (calmly) reminded us, āTreat your last exam like your first one.ā
It is difficult though, as I (and many other sympathisers) struggled to focus over the 1-week half term and Iāve had some mental fatigue after a tough week of 7 exams, especially after I feel like an infinite past-paper-muncher, the context to in the postās byline. Luckily, the next two are āchilled outā with merely 1 exam a day, 3 per week.
No shocks or scares just yet, hoping to keep it that way for the final stretch. However, AQA decided to pull a rabbit out of the hat by giving us a 9-mark question , mostly featuring something explicitly mentioned as ānot being assessedā. Anyways, after some drama (through online protests on Twitter - we are Generation Z teens after all), the exam board have awarded the 9 marks to everybody, a blessing for many, a bother for a few. Iām not complaining at all š¤.
Highlight of the week: the glorious sunshine. Nothing, simply nothing, can beat the feeling of sunshine on your face or even better your neckā¦
Of course, it has been mixed in with some typical British showers but hey, we canāt control itā¦
As we all do, I want to get the highest grades possible. The highest in the year š„ would be a nice prestige-boosting addition, I donāt mind sharing that. Whilst that might seem egotistical, and it probably is, I donāt see any harm in going for that. After all, we are all craving status, in some form.
But, Iāve realised this week that, it isnāt fully in my control. In theory, and in reality, I canāt control what the other students in my school get. Iām not preparing for them, nor am I doing their rexams. That has nothing to do with me. Instead, what I can affect is how I do. I can only do my best, āleave no stone unturnedā in preparation and then hope for the best (getting all 9s). Arguably, I canāt even control what grade I get, because of the way grades are calculated in the UK. Itās been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster with this for me, up and down, between realising that being 1st rank is out of my hands and panicking about others (appearing to be) doing very well, something that firstly isnāt worth worrying about and secondly is not something I can change.
It reminds me of the Serenity Prayer, one of the foundations of Stoicism. For those unaware, stoicism is a way of life to happiness and contentment. Thatās my definition; hereās Wikipediaās: āthe development of self-control and fortitude as a means of overcoming destructive emotionsā
The Serenity Prayer is,
God give me the serenity to accept the things which I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference between the two
A quote I used to say when I prayed to God in the morning (I always pray to God in the morning, makes me feel zen š§) and a thought I have (kind of) internalised. It is a simple distinction that really does relieve you of all kinds of stresses: what others think of you, politics, how your boss behaves to you. If you realise that, really, you canāt do much about it, in a weird sort of way, you gain = more autonomy, power and most importantly, peace of mind.
You canāt control the past anymore, you canāt directly control the future but you can influence the future now, in the present moment.
Another practical exam is the Physics exam. As is customary for me, the clock ticks to 1 and I flick through the paper, scanning to see what lies ahead. (My friend asked me recently why I do this. Iām not sure, I always have.) Anyways, as soon as I saw the question in focus (from above) I was taken aback. But then I calmed myself, saying, āOk, weāll do what we can.ā
I can recall so many more instances in the last 2 years or so where this quote has helped me. Iād go as far to say it has changed my life, genuinely. A massive thanks to Ali Abdaal for mentioning it to me.
Next time, when you are feeling a negative emotion about something, stop to think, āCan I control this?ā Be honest, donāt find a confusing roundabout way of saying that you can. If you can, what specifically do you need to do? More likely, if you canāt, itās not worth worrying or stressing about.
Podcast of the weekšļø
Stuff You Should Know: The Scintillating World of Interest Rates
Despite being an economics student myself, I learnt quite a bit in this. Critical to understanding whatās happened at the moment, explained in a simple way.
Video of the week š„
I would bet a few pounds that you canāt watch without being amazed.
Quote of the week š¬
āIn a world where you can be anything, be kind.ā - so many people(!)
Remember, there are so many things you have the power to do and control; there are even more things you canāt. Identify the distinction between the two.
Adi