Bonjour!
Thought I’d vary the opening line a bit this week. It’s been a mixed bag of a week in the UK: we’ve probably passed the peak of 2 things - the Omicron cases and the dark evenings. I was thoroughly enthralled to still be able to see my house as I trudged back home on Friday after Orchestra. However, the other side of the coin isn’t as pretty with the infuriating Djokovic screw-up and Boris Johnson’s failed attempt at ‘Try Not to Laugh’.
Personally, it’s been a week of getting back up to speed with school and the UK timezone. In probably the first time ever I can remember, waking up at 4 am on Monday morning (thanks to the trusty thank-you gift from intercontinental travel, jetlag. They never fail to give it to you, do they?) was a magical experience. I had so much time on my hands as I practised the sax, did the dishes, listened to some music…oh, it was amazing. If only I could do that every day…
Talk has swiftly turned to the big-boy exams being just 4 months away (from today, 16.01.22). To be completely honest, that doesn’t seem all that haunting and daunting. But, who am I kidding? Like I did with my Year 10 End-of-Year exams in June last year, I’m sure my mind’s got a few panic attacks lurking “dug in behind enemy lines”*
I’m a man of my words. So as revealed last time, today I’m going to amaze you with the value of a family tree.
Family interactions. We’ve had fewer of these in the past 2 years thanks to The One That Must Not Be Named or Had. In a slightly less apocalyptic, warlike world, we’d be seeing our family, close or distant, fairly regularly.
Coming from a Tamil (South Indian) heritage myself, yesteryear, it was very common to have many children. My now late paternal’s grandmother was the eldest of 6 boys and girls whilst my paternal grandfather also had 5 siblings. If you imagine the branches of that tree: 3/4 children per child who then go on to have children. Phew, that’s a lot of aunts, uncles and cousins. Add into the mix that the word ‘aunt’ and ‘uncle’ have 3 versions apiece, depending on their age and relation to you (through mum or dad) and there is no designated word for ‘cousin’, it can quickly get tangled up.
As we’d not been to India in 4 years, we had a constant stream of relatives through our door and of course, you don’t mean to offend anyone by not knowing who they are. So in an endeavour to better discover the complex links and relationships in our family, I set about drawing up a family tree. I started it briefly before we left for India and then, using the help of wise grandmas and grandpas, have constructed a decent-looking composition of boxes, lines and colours (that indicate gender).
And I will admit that creating this avoided so many awkward conversations and I definitely felt like I understood connections more. When somebody walked through the door with a beaming smile, after doing the courteous ‘Hello, how are you?’ and inviting them in, instead of having to discreetly yet quickly sneak to the parent in the room and ask who they are, I had a firmer understanding of who I was talking to and could have a sincere conversation with them.
So I highly encourage you to sit down with your mum, dad, grandparent or anybody else in your family and get started making your family tree. Even if you think you know the ins and outs of your mum’s grandmother’s brother-in-law’s kids, it will definitely be an opportunity to learn more about your history. And it’s quite fun getting to know the stories of those close to you.
The website I used was DNAweekly, purely because of its sharing functionalities (you can send the diagram to anyone, and give them editing access by simply sharing a link). It’s also free and gives you the chance to add pictures next to the names. However, if you don’t think attaching an image of your aunt grinning will be helpful, there are other alternatives you might fancy - here’s my honourable mention. This more sophisticated platform allows you to input a lot more information about the leaves on this tree.
I hope that helps. Even if you don’t have the time this week, put it as a job for the weekend or maybe the next holiday you get. As we know, saying you’ll do it later isn't the best option but it is a mildly time-consuming process. That said, the benefits to garner are significant and it doesn’t need much brainpower: it’s just listening and typing in names. So maybe throw in a TV show or music in the background?
Book of the week 📖
For the second week in a row, I haven’t done much reading. But, in my defence (read ‘because I want to conjure up some excuse) I have had issues with timings, coupled with catching up and a Hindu festival to close out the week. If you are desperate for a new book to read, one of my favourites last year was The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel. It’s a short, snappy, to-the-point, super book. The insights he offers are fueled with fascinating examples and my mind is found referring to them very often. Here’s are some of my favourite quotes:
Warren Buffett's skill is investing, but his secret is time.
There are books on economic cycles, trading strategies, and sector bets. But the most powerful and important book should be called Shut Up And Wait.
This is his reason:
Planning is important, but the most important part of every plan is to plan on the plan not going according to plan. Takes a bit of time to get your head around that one.
Your savings is the gap between your ego and your income. 😱
Podcast of the week🎙️
Finally finished this one. If you want to be a bit more mindful, here’s a few interesting practices.
Article of the week📰
How a Lazy Attitude Can Make You Incredibly Successful - Megan Holstein
If you’ve just gone “WWHHAAATT?” and feel disgusted at such a crazy proposition, hold that thought. Don’t be put off by the headline. There’s a key mindset shift in here.
Quote of the week💬
“Sometimes you win. Sometimes you learn” - John C. Maxwell
Keep going with those new year’s resolutions 👍!
Adi
*For those not provided the golden, once-in-a-lifetime, unmissable opportunity to learn 15 poems on Power and Conflict, that is a reference to a quote from Remains by Simon Armitage. A very good poem, in all honesty.